Of All The Newspapers In All the World
by pam halliwell
Summary: AU. In her summer between sophomore and senior, Rory starts an internship at The Hartford Gazette. Things quickle become interesting when she ends up working with Liz Mariano, Hartford's most notorious opinion columnist. Lit


I have been bamboozled into doing this. Kidding KIDDING. No seriously, thankyou once again to the lovely Hela who not only has inspired me but several writers on this site (I can actually list them if you want), she truly is a gem. She knows that i'm typing this at midnight but i wouldn't have it any other way because i miss the creative outlet and hey if it'll make her happy i'll do it :) least that i owe her.

Fyi, this story was actually written two years ago. It's in script form because i figured that since the show has ended maybe that's not such a big deal. Either way **I am in no way affiliated with the characters that you may recognize from Gilmore Girls, its writers or actors. **I'm just an 18 year old girl who lives on a very small island that mostly won't even know how to find on a map. Seriously if I wanted to steal money from these people, I'd have a better chance of stealing money from the Taj Mahal!

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Rory is seventeen and has just finished her sophomore year at Chilton. It's the summer between sophomore and senior year. Vamos? imagines she sees readers nodding Vamos.

GGGG

[A newspaper office building. On entering the silver revolving doors, you can see a high, large, semi-circular desk on your left with a large poster saying 'The Hartford Gazette'. Across you can see an elevator.

**Rory:** [enters the reception area [to herself Ok Ror, you can do this. It's only a summer job. The one you've dreamt about for the last sixteen years of your life but still a summer job.

**Receptionist:** [on the phone I'm sorry Mr. Hawkins is in a meeting sir. He will be for the next hour or so. Ms. Mariano is definitely unavailable. She's out on assignment. I'm afraid the news waits for no one. Yes I'm aware that you have an important scoop... Yes I fully trust your judgement but Ms. Mariano is following an important story right now... Yes if you'd like you can try again later... Very well... Thank you. Goodbye. [hangs up and looks exasperated

[turns to Rory [puts on a warm smile Good morning. What can I do for you?

**Rory:** Good morning. I'm here for the summer intern job. My name's Rory Gilmore. Mr. Hawkins is supposed to know about me.

**Receptionist:** [looks down at a list Ah yes of course. We've all heard about your impressive résumé Rory. Hawk told us all about you. Hawk would be Hawkins but give him some time to give you the green light with calling him that.

I'm Sophie Baxter. [holds out her hand for Rory to shake and Rory takes it You're gonna be seeing a lot of me. Everything that goes in and out of this place goes through me. One second. [picks up the phone and dials quickly Hawk. There's Rory Gilmore to see you. [winks at Rory Yeah I'll send her right up.

Ok Rory. Hawk's up on the first floor. He's got somebody in his office right now so give him a sec to finish up. Piece of advice: Hawks' the best boss you'll ever have but he's strict. He asks you to do something, he's already thought of everything so just do it. Don't forget, sweetheart, we're talking about the editor of the most influential newspaper in the state.

But you look like a nice, hard-working girl so I don't think you'll have any trouble. [Smiles a genuine smile at Rory

**Rory:** [looks nervous Thanks.

GGGG

[Rory comes out of the elevator on the first floor. The hustle and bustle of the offices is clearly visible.

**Rory:** [to a passing reporter who's sliding across the room on his swivelling chair Excuse me, Mr. Hawkins' office?

**Man:** [stops dead Mr. Hawkins? Who the hell...? Oh you must be the new kid? Nice to meet you. Jack Mitchell. [holds out his hand and they shake Looking forward to not being the new kid anymore. Just kidding. You're gonna be livin and breathin news by the end of the week Sparky but it's the best damn experience of your life. Hawk's at the very end. I suggest you get to know Penny before you talk to Hawk though.

**Rory:** Ok?

**Jack: **Office right next door to Hawk. You'll see her. Trust me. [and with that he's off again swivelling and yelling about getting someone's number

**Rory:** Thankyou.

**Jack:** [waves distractedly at her No problem.

[Rory walks through the mess of desks and papers and wires and finally reaches the two offices at the opposite end of the room. She sees a woman on the phone, talking animatedly

**Penny:** What do you mean he doesn't want to give us a comment? Listen buddy your job as a press agent is to give me a comment. My job as the journalist is to type it into this thing-a-ma-jig called a computer, string it together with a couple of colourful sentences that I had to get a degree to write and then send it to these really ugly guys downstairs so they can print it.

Then you know what happens. Wait for it, here's the dramatic climax, people, wait scrap that, LITERATE people read the paper for whatever reason suits them. Some just go right ahead to using the paper to wipe their dog's ass with. I know I do. But unless you give me a comment why the Mayor isn't spending money on what he promised he would, a lof of dogs are gonna be going around with shit hanging out. Do you want that? I mean public service isn't all that great right now. Which brings us back to our original point: Where's the money going buster? Or do you want me to print my example of the shitting dogs? Guys over at the cartoon section would love that! God it's like playing the obscene version of ring-a-round-a-rosies with you people...

The mayor's holding a press conference tomorrow morning. Huh must be a new development. I wonder what could have happened in the last half hour to make the mayor want to hold a press conference...

Ok yeah thank you.

Be careful you don't step in any dog shit. See you tomorrow. [a slow smirk appears on her face right before she notices Rory in the doorway Who the hell are you?

**Rory:** Rory... Rory Gilmore

**Penny:** Gilmore? Ah Gilmore. The new intern. Sorry about that. Last week one of the bimbos from the fashion magazine came over asking to go home cause she broke a nail.

So, welcome to the battlefield kid. Ok listen and listen good, I'm gonna give you the general blueprint of this insane asylum. Like I just said upstairs we've got the ditzes, the entertainment hounds and your basic non-main current news people. I guess they're journalists but you'll quickly learn kid that they're a whole different breed of their own. Further up, you've got the opinion columnists, quietest floor in the building cause none of them are ever there.

Now to the Grand Central. [steps out of her office and Rory quickly follows her To your right and to your left you've got my real definition of journalists. If you heard my little rant on the phone earlier, you've got the basics on what they do.

Over there is Mary, who shouldn't be here but is basically that annoying kid who talks to everyone at parties so you'll see her everywhere but never when you need her. Between you and me, the woman's probably slept with every chef from here to France.

Way, way in there, practically in Siberia, we share this floor with the sports section. Cough it up to Hawk's obsession with knowing how the Yankees are doing even though he hasn't been to see them since he left New York, which was probably before the world knew about Madonna. There's Tommy, he's our head of Sports. Never writes an article a day before it's due. Doesn't need to. I have a theory he can follow a game in his sleep.

That nimrod over there is Jack.

**Rory:** Oh I already met him.

**Penny:** Oh you poor thing, I'm so sorry. Well he just got promoted to Foreign News. [stage whisper If you ask me he's gayer than a flamingo.

**Jack:** For the tenth millionth time, I AM NOT GAY.

**Penny:** Ok so he's not a pink flamingo. He's still got that tint of red. I never know where the hell I'm going with this analogy. Jack your stupidity is rubbing off on me. Get away from me.

**Jack:** Gladly.

**Penny:** If I wasn't all for the gay movement I'd sock ya one.

**Jack:** [rolls his eyes Oh for the love of God.

**Penny:** Now we reach the main attraction of our floor. [works towards the office next to hers The Godfather, the Grand Papi, the Big Kahuna, the Chief if you will. Mr. Joey Hawkins himself or as you're gonna be calling him in about two minutes, Hawk. Best journalist that ever lived Hawk. You remember that kid. Somethin you can tell your grandkids.

[A man comes out of Hawk's office

**Man:** Nice seein you again Hawk. Send my love to your sister.

**Hawk:** You went out on one date three years ago Jake. Let it go.

**Jake:** I still say we had a connection.

**Hawk: **[chuckling Yeah that's why she's married and had four kids with somebody else.

**Jake:** She'll come around. See ya Hawk. Thanks again.

**Hawk: **Don't mention it. [chuckles again then turns and notices Rory Oh good you're here. Welcome to your internship newbie. Come in, come in. Everybody else, BACK TO WORK. God I love being the boss.

[Inside Hawk's office

**Hawk: **So Gilmore...you nervous?

**Rory: **To be honest... I'm petrified.

**Hawk: **Yeah I noticed you were honest in your interview. Doesn't matter we're not attorneys, we can afford to be honest.

But don't worry, you'll get the hang f this place in no time. By the end of the summer, you're gonna prefer this place to your own home, mostly because you're gonna be spending more time here. Remind me again how old you are.

**Rory: **16

**Hawk: **[low whistle 16. Wow! I started at 16. And I'm gonna stop there before I remind myself that I'm getting old.

Journalists have two main characteristics: Fast-typing fingers and seemingly short fuses. You my friend I'm pretty sure have neither, not at this stage. And please note that I said 'seemingly' short fuses. I won't deny there's an element of acting in our work. For that credit in Journalism I just suggest you watch Penny, she's the master at it.

**Rory:** Yeah I think I already got the course description while I was waiting for you.

**Hawk: **Ah wit, thank God. My sister's kids are really lacking in it. It does nothing to my hope for the next generation. Yeah I'd imagine Penny gave a show if she was calling up the mayor's press agent. He dated her sister a while back and they had a bit of a messy breakup. Look at me I sound like Carlita from our gossip section. Where was I?

**Rory:** The two main things journalists have.

**Hawk: **Right right. You're gonna make a great intern I see. But for now, all I can give you is coffee and obituaries.

I know not at all glamorous but look at it this way when I started out all I had was the coffee. I was excited if they sent me for a sandwich. Now let me show you to your quaint little corner and I don't mean 'quaint' as in homely.

[gets up and they walk to the opposite end of the floor to a desk next to the elevator

Here you go. You've got your basics, phone, pen and paper. The three Ps every journalist needs. More importantly, you're close to the elevator whenever we need you to run errands. Any questions?

**Rory:** One. What do I do first?

**Hawk: **Eager to work. I like ya already. First up you sit by this phone right here [moves her towards the desk and sits her down and take obituary calls. It's amazing how many people die between the hours of 10 and 12 in the morning. OK? All settled? Get to work then newbie.

**Rory: **On it Mr. Hawkins

**Hawk: **Hawkins? Which one of you knuckle-heads left it up to me to tell her to call me Hawk?

Newbie I don't want the word Hawkins to come out of your mouth when I'm in hearing distance, got it? Hawkins is what everybody called my dad. My dad who spent thirty years running a butcher shop in Queens and doing crossword puzzles with a German shepherd named Dynamo by his side. Forgive me if I'd like to get that image out of my head when I'm trying to decide whether to release that story which can ruin Senator Jacobs.

Ok. Anything SERIOUS crops up, I'll be in my office. [He leaves

**Rory: **[leans back on the chair Phew. [looks around to check if anybody can overhear her and softly sings I got my very own desk.

**Man: **Hey you the new intern?

**Rory: **[looks startled Ye... Yeah.

**Man:** [drops a pile of papers in her lap Take these to the third floor... MOVE IT.

[Later. At Luke's diner. Lorelai and Rory are eating.

**Lorelai**So in conclusion your first day was hell.

**Rory: **Yep that pretty much sums it up.

**Lorelai**What else did they have you do?

**Rory: **I actually put my knowledge of the Starbucks menu to good use with all the coffee runs they sent me on. But that does nothing to help the ringing in my ears. Is it possible for a phone to get tired of ringing?

**Lorelai**No that's the whole thing with inanimate objects, they never tire.

**Rory: **Why can't you be a good mommy and lie to me?

**Lorelai**[chuckles

**Rory: **Remind me again why I'm doing this.

**Lorelai**Because it's your dream bla bla bla. Because it's a great opportunity bla bla bla. Because you worked your ass for it bla bla bla.

**Rory: **It's a wonder you're not the one in journalism.

**Lorelai**But if that were true, what would the Inn do without their daily dose of sarcastic with a side order of witty in the form of yours truly?

**Rory:** Maybe you should be a journalist. You've got the self-confidence for it.

**Lorelai**No but you're the one who takes it all seriously what with the intelligence and that stringing sentences together thing you do so well.

**Rory: **You mean writing?

**Lorelai**Yeah that's it. Besides it's only fair that the editor of the school paper gets to live out her dreams huh?

**Rory: **Stop it.

**Lorelai**Oh you love every minute of it.

A/N: ok there it is first chapter. Shouldn't take long to upload next chapter and you'll get to know how Jess comes in aka the part I'm particularly proud of.

Click the purpleness pleasseeeeeeeeee :)

**IMPPPPP**: as you can see i'm having major trouble thinking of title so I was hoping, if anyone has any good ideas feel free to send them in. Thanks :)


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